Thursday, October 22, 2009

Awaiting the pay cheque...

Decided I needed to write something whilst the boss is away from her desk and I'm up to date with my work.

Well I have a cold and sound like a munchkin, its delightful. Other than that though it's all plain sailing and happy days.

Work is coming along nicely, continuous good appraisals, me, giving my colleagues no choice but to take me along to their meeting with them (which they don't seem to mind and gives me opportunity to get to know them better) and finishing work at a blissful 5.30 every day. Just waiting for that first pay cheque now so I can have an income again. Saying that it will soon be gone on bills and savings - ah well, I'll get there.

Things at work are becoming more social - I'm going to my colleagues 30th birthday party over the weekend and intend to dress up "Flashdance" style, followed by the following weekend where I'm participating in a 10K run for charity with my colleagues (fortunately someone dropped out so I jumped right in!) and then we have a Charity quiz in November followed by the Christmas party at Thorpe Park - i know!! in December.

Crikey, when I list it - that's quite a lot! Next year I intend to turn my extra curricular work activities to internal projects with the business and gain more knowledge of every area possible.

I'm completely absorbed in my job, fascinated and excited by everything that goes on, its great. This must have been how people felt at my old company who liked insurance... ergh... and finance... ergh... heehee :o)

I'm determined to prove myself, to rise above my position when I get confirmed in March then Mada and I can start to concentrate on buying our house and seeing a mortgage advisor.

If I get promoted to a Sales Executive I'll automatically get a company car. And as much as I don't want to sell my precious mini, I could save myself £250 a month without the cost of the car loan and insurance and that's a massive amount that could go towards our monthly mortgage.

I'm so determined to succeed it's unreal. I have never felt this way about any job, even when I was working to the bone at WR there was never passion just a MUST attitude.

Well if I am going to succeed, I guess I should get back to the job at hand. Thank GOD i waited those 4 long months - it was so worth it.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Conclusive Decision

I have decided that I love being in love, very much. I also love being loved. I love being told I'm loved and love telling that I love in return.

Love, love, love :o)

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Bbbbrrrrr!!

I nearly froze to death at the train station this morning, I thought the tip of my tippy-toes, fingers and nose may just fall off!!

Time to purchase some thermals and make it fashion!!

That, or just stop wearing ridiculously short dresses to work. Hum.

For Each A Road

"Do not follow where the path may lead. Go instead where there is no path and leave a trail..."

The Girls; Lori Lansens.

Monday, October 12, 2009

Happiness is Divine!

As the old saying goes - time flies when you're having fun.

I can't seem to breathe for a spare second at the moment but I will not complain one bit. I'm probably the happiest I have felt in a long time, maybe a few years. That's not to say I haven't had good times in the last few years (because I most certainly have) but I would say that overall I have a better balance - with happy times majorly out weighing any bad times.

Love is good. Work is good. And these are the two things that have been tiresomely bothering to me over the last year or so. That's really why I started full time blogging in the first place.

I feel like there is constantly so much to write about and catch up on - I see people in the streets and think how what i saw would make a funny or interesting entry. I feel a flutter in my heart or a niggle in my belly but by the time i get round to writing the moment has passed and the passionate ideas i had conjured up - disappeared. Oh well!

Now I'm working I'm trying to re balance all the important things in my life. Friendship for one has taken a backdrop. My first week I was exhausted and mentally retarded by 6pm so I didn't work out or see anyone all week (I know, shock horror!), last week, I managed to get to the gym on Monday, Wednesday and Friday. This week, I hope for the same work outs and also see BD on Tuesday and maybe another friend over the weekend.

Gradually in time I hope I can balance it all again.

It was so fabulous to finish work on Friday at 5.30 on the dot, grab the early train home without a worry in the world and knowing that some of my work for Monday had already been done and I only needed to client "send" this morning. Wow, you can't imagine the feeling!!

As the rentals have been on holiday Mada and I have made use of the alone time. Of course there has been lots of sexy time but more importantly it's been great, cooking together, chilling out in our PJ's and just feeling relaxed together. He was also a little distress after my first week in work as he saw me so much less - same amount of days, but less hours, so we rectified that this weekend.

As something nice, I took him to London Zoo on Saturday and we had such a laugh together - i have decided my new favourite animal is the Meerkat - so funny to watch! We followed that by taking a visit to China Town where he tried dim sum for the first time and LOVED it - I was so delighted! Planning to ask BD and Chris to come with us next time for the complete works. We came home and ate chocolate and drank milk in bed - perfect. HaHa! It was probably the nicest weekend I've had since I've been back. Sunday night all the cousins and partners got together at my cousin's house, it was a really nice, relaxed evening.

Well, must get on with what I'm paid to do - work to be done, but only just enough to keep me busy for the whole day ;o) Again, I shall not complain - for now! I have my first 121 with my manager at 2pm - fingers crossed it goes well. I think it will ;o)

Monday, October 5, 2009

Let's Multiply!

I've definitely learnt a lot about myself this week and last. It's amazing when put in new and unfamiliar surroundings how much you come to depend on yourself.

The new job involves a lot of maths, percentages, targets, gross profit... oh the list goes on (in the form of a spreadsheet) and if you know anything about me you'll know that maths is something I will literally do anything to avoid. It may not be the trickiest of calculations but when faced with numbers i just completely panic and go into meltdown mode.

Unfortunately at my job interview it wasn't really made clear to me just how much maths, formulas and spreadsheets were involved in the day to day running of my job (had it been so, i probably wouldn't have accepted it!) and so i am faced with two choices - face the challenge head on or run away and hide as usual.

This time I've decided to tackle it one on one. Literally. It's me against the world of multiply and division.

I have found over the course of last week and today that by breathing deeply, working slowly and methodically, ensuring I understand the theory behind the calculation, checking, double checking and OCD checking, I can do it.

I have literally amazed myself. The fear of failing and looking stupid (which, I really would do for most of the questions I would ask if I dare speak my thoughts)have driven me to self contain my questions and work out the answers by myself.

I'm really proud of myself. It probably sounds stupid to anyone reading this. But think of the hardest most challenging task you have to do and how much you hate doing it and how hard you find it every time you even look at it, simple or hard. Well that's me with numbers, but this week has been my first steps to opening my mind to the fact that I CAN do it.

On another note, I asked my manager if it would be OK if I left the office dead on 5.30 today as I wanted to make the 17.43 train to go to my body pump class. She looked at me as if I'd just asked for a pay rise. Guess I'm not use to working for a company which doesn't frown upon you leaving the moment you stop getting paid.

Sunday, October 4, 2009

Forever Friends

I'm sorry I couldn't take your call
I'm sorry you had to talk to silence
I'm sorry you felt so alone


I'm sorry I live a million miles away
I'm sorry I can't give you a hug
I'm sorry I can't be the best friend you need

For what it's worth, I'll never be sorry I met you, only sorry that it wasn't sooner and that I couldn't take you with me

xoxo

About Me

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Surrey, United Kingdom
"I have found that if a problem rears its head, the best way to deal with it is by being highly emotional, inconsistent and super irrational and the problem tends to go away..."