A Sigh of Relief

I can breathe again.

I went for dinner and a drink(s) with my boss NB last night and whilst I held my tongue for quite sometime, I eventually blurted out that I was really, really unhappy.

In a nutshell we talked for a long time and I was quite honest and frank with NB, and explained to him how unworthy I felt at WR. He looked at me sympathetically and oddly enough, not once did he argue with any of my points raised and finally commented that he was sorry that the company had failed me.

He asked me whether, if they made some changes at my request, would I stay past my contract and I shook my head. I told him that there had been so many promises broken by the company that I couldn't rely on that any more. I have tried with all my might and I am completely and utterly defeated.

We talked some more to which all was listened and I felt i was really understood by NB, to be fair he has always been the manager who has stuck up for me. We talked about the different ways I could resign and how I could get the most out of my situation.

I.E rather than giving 3 months notice, I offer 6 but negotiate having half of my bonus etc. I said I wasn't even sure if I could last that long but NB said when the finish line is in sight, it's easier than you think. I imagine he is right there.

I told NB that I didn't want my MD knowing I was on the verge of handing my notice in and asked for a couple of weeks to mull it over and make a confirmed decision. He said he would keep 75% of our conversation confidential and inform my MD of my great upset and that I am "considering my options". I trust him, I have to. I know I am overly trusting but I think that is something of my nature that will never change. I am an open book. Even if I hadn't have said a word, my eyes give away my feelings every time.

NB continued to finish the bottle of wine whilst I stuck to my two glasses as I was driving and he got suitably pissed. We then went onto another bar where I had a cappachino and he had a couple of beers. The long of the short of it is that it is more than evident that NB sees reason in all that I say and doesn't blame me for the way I feel, I could almost say that he was encouraging me to leave.


So today I do feel more positive and a weight off my shoulders has most definitely been lifted, now I feel like I have more of a structured plan I'm going to use this weekend as time to clearly think which step to take next. As I drove to work today I couldn't help but think how sad it will be to leave Malaysia (if that happens) but there are more blue skies ahead and clouds, with undoubtedly silver linings.